To prepare a fun ice-breaker for tomorrow’s organizational meeting, one of the administrative associates of our fine establishment sent out a survey. It said:

Please complete the survey below. Your answers will remain anonymous but shared at the meeting on Friday. You may be funny, sarcastic, serious, etc, but have FUN!

1. If you could replace one coworker with a celebrity who would it be and why? Be creative!

Answer: “would replace name of boss”

2. If you had to pick your replacement (celebrity, politician, another associate, etc.) who would it be and why? Again, be creative!

Answer: “Zsa Zsa Gabor because she’s pretty.”

I’m having difficulty summoning the energy for this adult day-care we call “work.” You know, forget religion. Ice-Breakers are the opiate of the masses.

“Enthusiasm commitee, what is your status,” asked the foreman.

A young woman wearing faded, torn jeans and a black t-shirt that read “Iron Maiden,” stood, rifling through her notepad. “Varying levels, as usual. A whimsical quote from the History department entered the Mind when we tested. Something from a summer camp experience. ‘Boy, are we enthusiastic.’ I believe it represents a forced, sarcastic response.”

The foreman stroked the hairs of his gray moustache. “Did you cross-reference this with the Desire sub-team?”

The woman in the black t-shirt was about to reply when another young woman blurted, “desire’s good. Enthusiasm received a learned response, that’s all.”

The foreman arched an eyebrow and turned to the second woman. “So, he’s into it?”

“Yep. He’s just reacting to Stress,” she replied, sitting back comfortably in her chair. The woman with the torn jeans slowly sat, glaring at her interupter coldly.

The foreman looked at his watch. He knew his team was running out of time, but for some reason, a solution eluded them. Nothing to do but continue to eliminate possibilities. Maybe then they could find the brick wall that was preventing the Mind from creating.

“Folks, we must get this Mind to begin the brainstorming process immediately. Chop chop.”

This silly narrative contains approximately 207 words. It took me 15 minutes to write them. During this quarter-hour, I edited, googled words and stared off into space, “thinking”, my usual writing behaviors.

In order to complete the 50,000 word novel in the month of November, one strategy is to write 1600 words a day. If my little test is my benchmark, then it looks like a 1600 word session will take me around 2 hours. I seem slow.

My brain immediately jumps into scheduling-mode. Here’s November.

Monday - Friday
5 AM. Alarm goes off. Don’t hit snooze, it will drive everyone to madness. Get up. Dress in comfies. Make coffee and pet the cat. Sit and stare. Turn on computer. Do not

check email. Do not check blogs.
5:30 AM - Start writing. Just go. Don’t stop to criticize. Make it happen.
7:30 AM - Pencils down. Shower. Forget about the story. Don’t dwell on it all day.

Saturday
7 AM. Sleep in until now. Make coffee and brush the cat.
7:30 - Write and forget about the mistakes or the made-up peanut gallery that is critiquing your every word.
11:30 AM - Watch football. Play. Eat.

Sunday
Off!

Note to self: look into mental conditions that have over-scheduling as an indicator or symptom.

(Three months later… )
I pulled a fast one this week and moved my website. Previously on Lost, I was using a high-falootin’ Typepad account which was very easy and slick but rather expensive for that sort of blogging service. This past year I learned more about creating my own hosted websites with various php/mysql components, so I started to feel like I no longer needed Typepad. So, since my Typepad account was about to renew this month, I cancelled it.

I use Dreamhost for my webhosting and I set up this new blog using their one-click wordpress install. I have a couple of websites that use this format. One is a new gaming blog and the other will be a webcomic. This morning I thought of one more I’m going to make: a blog for my go at the National Novel Writing Month in November.

Speaking of NaNoWriMo, if you’re interested in trying to write 50,000 words in November, sign up at the website and make it go! If you do, let me know. I’d love to be a part of a novel-writing support group, and I have plenty of friends who write well. You know who you are. In fact, I just threw down the gauntlet to one friend who could write a killer novel with one side of his brain tied behind his back.